I hate it when I settle in to read a book that I think will have lots of cool bird facts and it ends up devoting way too much time to a dead white guy. And if you’re wondering “well really, how often could that happen?” the answer is, at least twice. The first time was A Most Remarkable Creature and the second was H is for Hawk by Helen MacDonald.
Lest you think me cruel and crass, I’m not talking about MacDonald’s father. I knew this was a book about the author training a hawk while mourning her dad’s sudden death, so I expected a certain amount about him. What I did not expect was so much about late British author T.H. White. In fact, I think there’s actually more about White than about MacDonald Senior.
The problem with these books that seek to weave a historical biography into another narrative is they rarely manage to do a satisfying job of either narrative. And in the case of H is for Hawk, we have three narratives:
- Helen MacDonald is mourning her father, the first major loss of her adult life.
- Helen MacDonald, an experienced falconer, is training a goshawk for the first time.
- T.H. White also trained a goshawk and wrote a book about it; he was not an experienced falconer.
I did feel like narratives 1 and 2 meshed pretty well together, because they are both about MacDonald. She is experiencing significant grief, and she is training a bird to cope. Whether she is thinking about her father’s life, the aftermath of his death, or training the bird, she is narrating her own life.
White’s experiences with his goshawk serve as a contrast to MacDonald’s experiences, but the biographical details of his life feel more like a distraction from the main story. This is probably because he was, to put it bluntly, a miserable man. I feel bad for him. He was gay and a sadist in a time where sodomy was illegal. If he was alive today, he could have potentially been openly gay, gotten more effective therapy for his childhood trauma, and found a healthy outlet for his sadism in the BDSM community. Instead, he had a therapist who was trying to “cure” his sexuality, a series of failed relationships with women, and bad ideas about how to train birds.
To be clear, I’m not sure MacDonald’s ideas of how to train birds are great, either. I’m still sorting out my feelings about falconry. I’m in favor of birds that cannot live in the wild (due to injury or habituation to humans) serving as educational ambassadors, but I’m not a huge fan in general of non-domesticated animals being kept in human homes and forced to hunt when and where humans think they should.
Between my dislike of the sections about White and my discomfort about hawk training, I really didn’t enjoy this book. I do think MacDonald did a very good job of writing about her grief in a way that was heart-felt and portrayed how weirdly normal your state of mind can seem to you when you’re depressed. I also think she’s a technically good writer from a pure craft point of view. Her descriptions of birds and the countryside are quite enjoyable.
This is a well-regarded book, so you may feel differently than I did, but I wouldn’t personally recommend this book.
TWs and CWs: In addition to the obvious themes of parental death and homophobia, this book also includes animal abuse, animal death, child abuse, domestic abuse, strong language, very brief mention of infant death, discussions of war, depictions of grief and depression, and a brief bit of racism.
Source and Format: I borrowed the audiobook from King County Library System.
Reading Challenge Prompts
World of Whimm: Deals with Mental Health. I think perhaps the strongest parts of this book are when MacDonald is describing being depressed, going to a doctor for help, and starting to come out of her depressive state.
SAL/SPL/KCLS: Recommended by a Library Worker. I had originally intended to use this book for the Grief square, but then I read Notes from a Regicide and felt like it explored grief from more angles. But this book was on my radar in the first place because it was part of the list of recommendations I got from a Sno-Isle librarian last year.
Reading Challenge Progress
Nook & Cranny (Card 1): 10 of 25, no bingos.
Nook & Cranny (Card 2): 13 of 25, 1 bingo.
Book Riot: 12 of 25.
Physical TBR: 6 of 12.
World of Whimm: 15 of 24, no bingos.
SAL/SPL/KCLS: 3 of 23, no bingos.